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We have an Outposter review of Death of a Unicorn. Take it away Poopy. We saw the trailer the other day, well, now here’s a review.
Death of a Unicorn
Death of a Unicorn stars Rudd, Ortega, Tea Leoni, Will Pouter, Sunita Mani, Richard E. Grant, Jessica Hynes, and Anthony Carrigan. Newcomer Alex Scharfman is the writer and director.
Come for the mythical horned horse, stay for the psychological scarring bonding experience. There are not enough unicorn movies. I’ve said it, I stand by it, and I’m pretty sure liking unicorns is perfectly heterosexual, like crying during Pixar films and changing your own oil while humming Celine Dion. It’s called having layers.
The last decent unicorn sighting I recall was Stardust — a clever little gem that treated its unicorn with reverence, sparkle, and mild trauma. So when looking through the cinema sessions, I saw a new movie called Death of a Unicorn, I thought, “Oh! Maybe this is the magical comeback I’ve been waiting for.”
Then I saw the cast: Jenna Ortega and Paul Rudd? That’s at least 1.5 national treasures right there. Paul Rudd, whom I always suspected may or may not be ageing backwards using unicorn blood. Sounded harmless enough. So I turned to my 12-year-old and said, “Get dressed, kid. We’re going to the movies.”
Not what I thought
Little did I know, this was a horror movie. Here I am, Gandalf, leading Frodo into hell, with popcorn.
Cue me, sitting there, realising too late we were in for blood, guts, and probably the most traumatic unicorn content since Lisa Frank got discontinued. BUT—I had a surprisingly great time. Genuinely. This movie gave me Demon Knight vibes with just a dash of George of the Jungle chaos.
Not that it’s anything like George of the Jungle. Tragically, there’s no Brendan Fraser in a loincloth, but both films knew how to get the audience involved. The characters make bad decisions after another— “Don’t go in there!” and then they go in there… again. It’s entertaining, frustrating, and somehow delightful.
Let’s talk flaws: Modern movies have a problem. Not enough unicorns, yes, and also — editing. It’s a fucking lost art.
This movie lags, like Wi-Fi when you’re downloading porn and you havent noticed the hidden pop up window and the auto update taking place. If every scene had just been trimmed and zipped up a little tighter, the film could’ve lost ten minutes and gained an extra gold star.
Still, if you’re looking for a film that’s part fever dream, part throwback, and part “I don’t know why anyone greenlit this but I’m glad they did,” Death of a Unicorn delivers.
3 and a half horn stabs out of 5.
Death of a Unicorn is still in the cinemas.
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