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DwC returns for 2025 with another edition of Masterpiece Theater. His continuing mission is to analyze movies for hidden depths that prove their worth in the pantheon of cinema. He really is too good to us, especially this time around as he tackles what is a stone-cold classic to Outposters of a certain age. Jean-Claude Van Damme’s Bloodsport. Quick, to the nostalgia mobile!
Bloodsport
Bloodsport is directed by Newt Arnold, and written by Sheldon Lettich, Christopher Crosby, and Mel Friedman. It is based on events in the life of Frank Dux.
*This analysis will contain spoilers*
Frank Dux is a fighting machine. Trained in the art of Ninjutsu by the inimitable Senzo Tanaka after Senzo’s son Shingo, Dux’s best friend, was killed. Years later, to honor Senzo, Dux goes AWOL from the military and flees to Hong Kong to participate in the Kumite, a secretive and brutal martial arts tournament.
Upon arriving in Hong Kong, Dux befriends fellow Kumite participant Ray Jackson and becomes romantically involved with Janice Kent, a reporter who is trying to get a story about the Kumite.
Before long, Dux draws the ire of the reigning Kumite champion, the psychotic Chong Li. Pursued by agents of the U.S. government and wanted by the Hong Kong police, Dux fights his way through the tournament on a collision course with Chong Li, who wants nothing more than to kill Frank Dux in the final round of the Kumite.
According to The Secret Man, a book written by Frank Dux, Frank Dux is the toughest human being who ever walked the earth. Trained as a Ninja at the age of sixteen*, Dux was a martial arts master recruited by the CIA for covert missions in Vietnam after the war ended*.
His record was so impressive that he received the Medal of Honor in a ceremony that was held in secret to protect his identity*.
After he retired from the CIA, Dux continued to fight for those less fortunate, at one point selling his prized Katana for quick cash that he needed to procure the release of orphaned children who had been kidnapped by pirates*.
When the pirates pulled a double cross, Dux and his squad of mercenaries engaged them in a firefight, killing them all and rescuing the children*. He was also recognized by the United States Marines as the greatest knife-fighter who ever lived*.
His most impressive feat, however, was becoming the first Westerner to win the Kumite*, a secretive, full-contact martial arts competition held every five years by the shadowy International Fighting Arts Association. Dux won every fight, securing fifty-six consecutive knockouts* in the process.
Smarter men than myself did the math on this and concluded that for this statistic to be accurate, everyone on the planet would have been a participant in that year’s Kumite, which is obviously not true because I’m not sitting here with a Kumite Championship trophy in my trophy case, bad motherfucker that I am.
All of these things definitely happened, and are certainly not the product of a delusional bullshit artist. When screenwriter Sheldon Lettich met Frank Dux and heard the story of the Kumite, he knew he had a hit film on his hands. The rest, as they say, is history.
*Frank Dux actually claimed these things happened
Muscles From Brussels
After hammering out a script and securing funding, there was only one question for the brass at Cannon Films to answer: who do you get to play the baddest man on the planet when Chuck Norris is unavailable? The answer: Jean-Claude Van Fucking Damme. The ‘Muscles from Brussels’ was relatively unknown at the time, but that was about to change; Bloodsport was going to make him a superstar.
Director Newt Arnold saw Cannon Films greats such as Cobra, Missing in Action, and Invasion USA, and said, me too.
But Arnold and Lettich weren’t looking to make a movie filled with explosions and Bruce Willis shooting people in the dick from underneath a conference room table. As awesome as that is, they, along with Van Damme, wanted to showcase different martial arts styles from around the world in a film that was truly about Fighting.
The film’s opening focuses not on the main character, but on the IFAA preparing for the Kumite and the various fighters finishing up their training before leaving for Hong Kong.
They punch blocks of ice; they throw bales of hay at their hapless sparring partners; they even jump into trees and karate chop coconuts in half with their bare Goddamned hands. After a minutes-long montage of this, the first of many, many montages, we cut to Frank Dux (Jean-Claude Van Damme) delivering roundhouse kicks to a speed bag in the gym of a military base. He’s interrupted by a pencil pusher (Edward Ketterer) with bad news: Col. Cooke (Ken Boyle) wants to see him.
He heard about his plans to go fight in the Kumite. Why Dux said anything to anyone about the super-secret, underground, bare-knuckle fighting tournament he’s going to participate in at the expense of the U.S. military is anyone’s guess. Then again, Frank Dux being a loud-mouthed idiot who won’t shut the fuck up is probably the most accurate thing in the movie.
Dux agrees to meet the colonel after he takes a shower, but he pulls a fast one and escapes. Col. Cooke is furious, telling the nerd to get Agents Helmer (Norman Burton) and Rawlins (Forest Whitaker) on the case, and:
“I don’t want to see your face again until Dux is beside it!”
His maniacal, wild-eyed delivery is stellar, made even more impressive because his lines clearly weren’t dubbed in by someone else.
Dux visits his sick Shidoshi, Senzo Tanaka (Roy Chiao), and tells him he’s going to fight in the Kumite to honor him. He then has a flashback to the time he first met Senzo and his son, Shingo. A young Dux gets caught breaking into Tanaka’s house, and when his pals take off, Dux stays to respectfully return a Katana to its cradle.
Then Shingo runs in and kicks him in the gut, and Tanaka imparts an important life lesson: you can’t get a Katana through theft, you have to earn it through assault. Then he chops the brim off Dux’s hat with the sword. Impressed because Dux didn’t flinch, Tanaka offers a deal: help him train his son, learn some karate in the meantime, and all is forgiven.
What Tanaka fails to mention is that Shingo is just gonna kick the shit out of him for a few months. When Dux protests, Shingo taunts him:
“Why don’t you quit, round-eye?!”
While I can’t condone Shingo’s racism, things are about to change. The next day, some bullies are beating up Shingo when Dux arrives and kicks the crap out of them. The 7th grader in the Bartles and Jaymes t-shirt approves.
Fuck, the 80s were awesome.
Dux helps Shingo off the ground, and they bond over this act of violence.
Skip ahead a few years, and Shingo is dead, presumably killed in the Kumite, and Dux wants Tanaka to train him in the art of Ninjutsu. Tanaka agrees, and a training montage depicting Dux’s growing skills follows. At first, he’s just getting tossed around, but then he starts defending himself.
Next thing you know, he’s grabbing fish while blindfolded, serving tea while blindfolded, and blocking Tanaka’s sucker punches… while blindfolded. He gets strung up in trees a lot, too, helping to perfect that trademark Van-Damme split. Before long, he earns that Katana.
Once in Hong Kong, Dux catches a bus where a big American dude (Donald Gibb) is drinking beer and harassing a local woman:
“Hey baby, you wanna go out with a real big man?”
She sits there stone-faced, so he concludes:
“Too good lookin’ for ya, huh?”
Dux sees him again in the lobby of his hotel, this time playing the classic Data East arcade game Karate Champ. Noticing Dux looking over his shoulder, he asks if he wants to go head-to-head. Dux eagerly agrees, and a tense game of Karate Champ ensues, with Dux emerging victorious. The guy introduces himself as Ray Jackson and tells Dux he’s fighting for real in the Kumite, to which Dux responds that he’s also there for the Kumite.
“Aren’t you a little young for full contact?”
“Aren’t you a little old for video games?”
They play again, and a friendship is forged. Dux and Jackson are greeted by Victor Lin (Ken Siu), who is their chaperone and our deliverer of exposition. Lin takes them to the fight venue to get checked in.
Going Underground
The entrance is guarded by some shady-looking cats, and Lin tells them to protect their nuts; this is the real China. The goons check their papers, and the boss delivers an enthusiastic thumbs-up:
“OK USA!”
They enter a dank alleyway to the sound of what I’m pretty sure is a baby crying, in a scene that’s a great metaphor for leaving civilized society behind and being birthed into the secretive world of the Kumite. They enter the fight hall and… It’s nice! The IFAA did a Hell of a job cleaning up the joint.
The officials check their invitations while the other fighters are warming up with some light sparring. But there’s a problem: Dux’s invite says Senzo Tanaka was his Shidoshi, and he doesn’t look like Tanaka Clan. Lin asks the question on all our minds:
“What’s the difference if Bruce Springsteen is his Shidoshi?”
It’s a valid point. They didn’t question Jackson, and he’s a beer-drinking slob in a Harley Davidson T-shirt. But Dux must prove he’s Tanaka Clan by successfully performing the Dim Mak, or: ‘death touch.’ They head over to a conveniently placed table stacked with bricks, where Dux asks Jackson to pick one. Jackson selects the top brick in the middle stack. Just as Dux is ready to unleash the fury, one of the officials yells:
“NO! Bottom brick.”
This gets the attention of the other combatants, who stop what they’re doing to watch.
Dux concentrates, and, in glorious slow motion, delivers a palm heel to the top brick, transferring the force to the bottom one, which explodes.
The officials honor his invitation amid a round of applause from the fighters. But reigning Kumite champion Chong Li (Bolo Yeung) isn’t impressed:
“Very good. But brick, not hit back.”
Across town, Helmer and Rawlins ask the head of the Hong Kong police, a reluctant Inspector Chen (Phillip Chan), for help in locating Frank Dux. He’d obviously rather let the Kumite proceed without incident, but pledges support anyway.
Dux and Jackson arrive back at the hotel after a long day of punching bricks and drinking beer, where they see another fighter, Hossein (Bernard Mariano), harassing Janice (Leah Ayres), a reporter trying to get a story on the Kumite. She calls him an asshole, and just as he’s about to give her a taste of the back of his hand, Dux grabs his arm. Hossein’s trainer, Hiro (Kimo Kai Kwok Ki), recognizes Dux:
“He is the American shit who makes tricks with bricks.”
Let’s pause for a moment to appreciate the brilliance of this dialogue.
Good.
Jackson smells violence, and his eyes gleam, but Dux doesn’t want to get kicked out of the tournament, so he proposes a bet: if he can grab a quarter out of Hossein’s hand before he closes it, Dux gets the girl. If not, Hossein and his boys get to take her to their room and…
Hossein agrees. Janice doesn’t, but she has no say in this. Dux hands him the quarter and remembers that time he was catching koi from Tanaka’s pond. Hossein says go, and upon feeling the weight of the coin still in his hand, he gloats:
“HA! You lose, American asshole!”
But Hossein opens his hand to reveal a piddly Chinese penny in place of the quarter. Hossein looks like someone just sprayed him with shit mist.
The symbolism is brilliant here, as Lettich insults multiple countries at once. Hossein, being Arabic, is deemed not worthy of possessing an American quarter, so he’ll have to settle for a near-worthless Chinese penny instead. Take that, foreign countries! 1980s American exceptionalism, baby. Dux sees this as an excellent opportunity to put the moves on Janice, so he asks her to dinner.
The next morning, Jackson, drinking a beer of course, walks in on Dux doing the Van Damme split between two chairs. They have to go. It’s day one of the Kumite.
After the opening ceremony, Lin explains the rules to Dux, Jackson, and most importantly, us:
“It’s full contact. There are three ways to win: One, you knock your opponent out. Two, the other guy quits, and shouts maté!’ It’s like saying ‘Uncle.’ Three, you throw the fucker right off the runway.”
Round one of the tournament begins with Sen Ling (Nathan Chukueke) getting his face splattered by Suan Paredas (Michel Qissi), and Jackson delivers a kickass title drop:
“That’s why they call this thing ‘bloodsport,’ kid.”
Jackson is next. His training in Drunken-Bar-Brawl-Jitsu obviously didn’t focus on defense, as he just lets the other guy hit him until he sustains a bloody nose, to which he doesn’t take too kindly. He delivers a hammer fist to the top of the guy’s head, temporarily knocking his soul out of his body.
We then get to see how badass Chong Li is when he takes on Budimam Prang (Samson Li) and finishes him in 14.8 seconds, setting a new world record.
Dux is up, and he’s fighting his old buddy Hossein. Still stinging after being humiliated by Dux, Hossein wants vengeance, threatening to do to Dux what he’s been doing to the English language all movie:
“Now I show you some trick or two!”
Hossein throws a punch, but Dux grabs his arm and chops him in the face a couple of times, knocking Hossein out. When Hossein revives, he tries to sucker punch Dux, but Dux delivers an elbow to the jaw, de-toothing Hossein for his trouble.
The janitor’s eyes light up upon seeing that gold-plated incisor lying on the mat. He picks it up and bites down on it to determine if it’s real gold, then sticks it in his pocket after confirming that it is. Maybe it’s just me, but if I find a bloody tooth that has spent years in another human being’s face, I’m probably going to let the guy at the pawnshop test it in lieu of placing it in my fuckin’ mouth.
Dux defeated Hossein in 12.2 seconds, breaking Chong Li’s record. Li looks like someone just shot his dog, and Dux just made an enemy. The rest of the fights play out in a montage, and I’ve already lost count of how many montages there have been.
That evening, Dux and Jackson are hanging out at the hotel when they’re approached by Helmer and Rawlins, who were tipped off to Dux’s location by Inspector Chen. Jackson wants to know who these scumbags are, and he doesn’t appreciate Rawlins calling him his pal, so he voices his displeasure with a line I use at work on an almost daily basis:
“I ain’t your pal, DICKFACE!”
They pull tasers, but Jackson springs into action and tackles them while Dux makes a run for it. The agents give chase in yet another montage that ends when they fall into the bay, and Dux escapes in a rickety fishing boat.
That night, it’s dinner with Janice, who is so desperate for a story she makes it abundantly clear that the no-pants dance is on the table in exchange for a scoop. Dux takes her up on it, but the next morning, he still won’t talk.
Day two of the Kumite:
Jackson is showing the officials his own version of the Dim Mak. He fails spectacularly to break the bottom brick, but as a consolation prize, he picks it up, head-butts it into oblivion, and hands the pieces to the dumbfounded officials. Dux is getting a kick out of this when Janice walks in with a Chinese businessman and whispers that this isn’t the first time she went undercover to get a story, implying rather heavily that she’ll bang just about anyone to get that scoop. Where’s Hossein?
The first fight of the day is Paco (Paulo Tocha) vs. Toon Wing Sum (John Cheung). It’s a brutal fight, but Paco eventually secures the victory with some vicious elbows to the face and a knee to the brain. Blood sprays, and Janice is disturbed by the violence.
Now it’s Dux vs. Ng Yuk Shu (Yu-Shu Wu), and it really must be noted how brilliantly choreographed the fights are in this segment. Dux and Shu trade kicks before Dux gets the better of him. Chong Li fights Suam Paredas, giving him a compound fracture of the tibia in the process. Janice is appalled.
Another montage occurs before Dux faces off against Joao Gomez (Joao Gomes), who threatens to kill Dux by making the throat-cut gesture during the staredown. Dux advances after kicking Gomez into the sun.
Pumola (David Ho), using monkey kung fu, an actual thing, is defeated by Ricardo Morra (Eric Neff). Morra, who is a monster, then squares off against Dux. He gives Dux some trouble before Dux, in an iconic move, drops into a split and punches Morra right in the nuts, ending the fight and making every man in the audience wince.
Then:
“Time to separate the men from the boys.”
Ray Jackson vs Chong Li.
Jackson beats the shit out of Li, but when he knocks Li down, his arrogance gets the best of him. Instead of finishing Li for good, Jackson starts running around, yelling his own name. This gives Li time to recover, and he takes Jackson down. Li doesn’t like being embarrassed, so he stomps Jackson’s head in before taking his bandana and taunting Dux with it.
At the hospital, Dux and Janice are informed that Jackson is going to be alright. When Dux vows to make Chong Li pay, Janice goes nuts. She wants Dux to quit so he doesn’t get killed, but Dux is having none of it.
Chicks, man; they just don’t get it.
Lin tells Dux to keep his shit together while Janice runs to the police and tells Inspector Chen where the Kumite is being held. Dux hops a bus, and we get a montage featuring clips of scenes we just saw 5 minutes ago, which is a bold creative decision by the director.
On the final day of the Kumite, Dux is walking down that creepy alley as a weird guy sits there laughing at him. Then, Hong Kong police start popping out of cubby holes only to be assaulted by Dux. When he gets to the end of the alley, Helmer, Rawlins, and Inspector Chen are waiting with tasers. Dux uses a garbage can lid as a shield to deflect the darts into the torsos of two more police officers, rendering them helpless, so Chen and the agents decide to let him go.
Hong Kong is a big city. I’m sure Chen could have six dozen officers there in a snap to shut the whole thing down, but I guess he just wants to see what all the fuss is about.
Dux defeats Paco in the semi-finals, and then it’s Chong Li vs Chuan Ip Mung (Dennis Chiu). Chong Li beats the stuffing out of this guy, then when he’s out cold, and the fight is clearly over, Chong Li flat-out murders him by snapping his neck. In front of the head of the Hong Kong police.
So, Dux wins by disqualification after Inspector Chen arrests Li for murder, right? Nope. He just… gets away with it. But hey, at least the IFAA officials turn their backs on him. That’ll teach him.
Chong Li prepares for the finals by hiding a salt tablet in his belt. Sneaky son of a bitch. The attention to continuity cannot be ignored as they take their place on the platform; all the blood from the previous fights still stains the mat. It’s an awesome touch. Chong Li tries one last time to hit Dux in the mind, Reggie Dunlop style, by pointing to Jackson’s bandana tied around his leg.
“You break my record, now I break you. Like I break your friend!”
The match begins with Dux’s foot, Chong Li’s face, and some foot-face fuckery. Chong Li responds to this by using the referee as a shield against Dux. Janice, Rawlins, and Helmer are having a blast, cheering and clapping so enthusiastically that you’d never know they just witnessed a murder fifteen minutes ago.
The fight is going back and forth before Dux starts gaining the upper hand.
He spins, he flips, he drops Li, and the crowd goes bananas. Li then crushes the salt tablet and uses it to blind Dux. Li starts kicking his ass, and Van Damme displays some serious acting chops by doing a lot of slow-motion screaming.
Director Newt Arnold then makes what I believe is cinematic history with a montage consisting of previous montages. Not even Alfred Hitchcock was genius enough to think of this. The montage montage helps Dux focus. And now…
It’s time to do some Van-Damage.
A totally blind Dux starts thrashing Li, so Li throws the ref at him in the hopes that he will roundhouse the man. It doesn’t work; Dux floors Li one final time and nearly twists his Goddamned head off until he says maté. He retrieves Jackson’s bandana as the IFAA salutes him as the new Kumite champion.
Dux returns Jackson’s bandana at the hospital, and Jackson vows to be there for Dux anytime, anywhere. Unless they have to fight each other in the next Kumite, then that shit is out the window. Janice tries to pretend like they’re kidding.
Before Dux boards the airplane home, he bows to Janice. The screen freezes, and the real Frank Dux’s completely unembellished stats are shown before the credits roll.
Fire The Cannon!
There are few things better than 80s action movies, and nobody did 80s action movies quite like the Cannon Group. Cannon was largely known for soft-core nudie flicks European art house films in the late 60s and early 70s. By the late 70s, the company had fallen on hard times, and its value plummeted.
In 1979, cousins Menahem Golan and Yoram Globus purchased Cannon Films for a measly $600,000. After securing the rights to 1974’s Death Wish, they got Charles Bronson and director Michael Winner on the phone and ordered up a sequel. Death Wish 2 was a smash. Cannon Films was back in a big way, and the cousins set out to prove that the best way to make movies was perched atop an ocean liner of bullshit adrift on a sea of insanity.
It’s become the stuff of Hollywood myth, but it’s all true: contracts written on bar napkins, movies being greenlit, funded, and announced before scripts were written or stars were signed, and whatever the fuck The Apple was. The history of Cannon Films is far too convoluted to be covered here, but the documentary Electric Boogaloo: The Wild, Untold Story of Cannon Films is very thorough and quite fascinating.
Bloodsport was one of the last films produced by Cannon during this spectacular period, and it wasn’t released until after the studio was taken over by the French company Pathé Communications. Despite this studio shake-up, Bloodsport was a huge hit.
And as far as its real-world impact? Immeasurable. From the UFC, which utilized the film’s tournament format before it got pussy-fied, to video games like Mortal Combat and Street Fighter, the reverberations of the film are felt to this very day.
Van Damme would go on to have an amazing career before the cinematic landscape shifted away from R-rated action movies with stars who were real-life badasses and moved towards tame rubbish like The Fast and The Furious with walking ham sandwiches like Vin Diesel.
But we’ll always have the glorious heyday of the 80s, that brief, shining moment when highly irresponsible and absurdly violent films reigned supreme. One of the best and most important films ever made in any genre; few others can match the technical zenith and cultural significance of Bloodsport.
10 broken tibias out of 10
-DwC
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