I said I wasn’t going to watch a moment of The Acolyte, no matter how many times I returned to Star Wars like an abused spouse – I know Star Wars loves me really, I just make it so angry sometimes. It’s my fault probably. I should probably keep my mouth shut when Star Wars has been out drinking with its buddies all day. I will just tell everyone I walked into a door.

I have held firm. Andor season 2 gets a pass, but the rest of it can fuck right off now. This show has never been entertained in the Stark household.

That said, I do watch a lot of movie-related YouTube as I pound the treadmill in an effort to delay / reverse this advancing middle-aged Dad-bod, and what I have seen from a commentary point of view makes it seem mind-blowingly awful. Not just awful, but deliberately awful.

The only way something can be as truly terrible as the level of awfulness I have seen in those videos from people like The Critical Drinker is if it is actually deliberate, machine-tooled awfulness.

It is almost as if they are letting you know that they know. That they bent Star Wars over and gave it the full-on Deliverance, piggy squealing treatment, and now they are just wiping their dicks on your Star Wars curtains while laughing in your faces.

So with this sheer bilge being spewed onto screens, it was inevitable that they would try some of their now-standard fuckery, some of their usual gaslighting. They did. What is amazing about The Acolyte is that its awfulness was so all-encompassing that it even escaped Disney damage control.

The show sucks so bad, even they can’t hide it. Episode 3 appears to have been the straw that broke the camel’s back.

Despite all of their spin and press releases about huge viewing figures and great reactions, despite all their paid shills and beating the access media with the threat stick, they cannot hide it any longer. The dam has burst.

Kathleen Kennedy is trending right now on X (formerly known as Twitter) and none of it is good news for Disney and Lucasfilm. Even the most tolerant and forgiving of fandom, who proudly trumpeted that “The Force is female” and went to D23 to wave their lightsabers around, have had enough. The Acolyte is the show that finally broke them.

Even Elon Musk is getting in on the act. The internet is aflame with absolute contempt. I am not sure I have ever seen anything savaged quite like this before that didn’t involve multiple deaths. The rumors said Iger had serious concerns over this show and it was greenlit against his advice. Disney stockholders have every right to ask questions over the stewardship of their $4 billion investment.

There is no coming back from this one.

 

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